July 12, 2011
I would like crazy right-wingers to buy me hundreds of toy weasels
Erick Erickson appears to be unhappy with Mitch McConnell's debt limit raising proposal. At least, that's what I gauged from a post titled "It Is Time To Burn Mitch McConnell In Effigy. he Goes Pontious Pilate on the Debt Ceiling:"
Mitch McConnell is right now talking about making a historic capitulation. So fearful of being blamed for a default, McConnell is proposing a compromise that lets Barack Obama raise the debt ceiling without making any spending cuts at all.
Consider sending McConnell a weasel as testament to his treachery. His address is 601 W. Broadway, Room 630, Louisville, KY 40202 and the phone number is (502) 582-6304.
Okay, hold it right there. Erick, consider this post an open letter.
Erick, we disagree on a lot of things. Women's reproductive rights. Gay rights. Fiscal policy. That setting people on fire is bad. That negotating a settlement on the national debt limit may not actually be tantamount to allowing the messiah of the Christian religion to be executed by having nails hammered into him. Many, many things.
But I feel that the non-crazy part of your post reflected something we are both deeply concerned about, and that is fiscal waste. Neither of us want to see the hard-earned dollars of decent, honest Americans be frivilously spended.
But Erick, that's what you're going to get mailing a bunch of toy weasel balls to the Senate Rebulican Leader. Hell, he probably won't even get batteries for them. If you really want to avoid wasteful spending, then it is a moral--yes, moral--obligation of your site's readership to send those toy weasel balls to someone who will appreciate them.
That person, of course, is me. I would like your thousands of readers to send me the toy weasel balls instead. Please.
Now don't get me wrong, I realize you're trying to accomplish some sort of message here. And even as an evil, hateful liberal I understand your disapproval and would still be willing to assist you. So here's the deal: I'm not saying I'm trying to stop your expression of angeer at Mitch McConnel through toy weasel balls. I just feel that as toy weasel balls, I should have them, so I can revel in their toy weasel ball awesomeness. What I will do is take a picture of the toy weasel balls, and send them to Mitch McConnell, explaining what exactly it was your objective was. This way, you can continue to be angry, your readers will have still participated in democratic protest, and I will have, hopefully, hundreds of toy weasel balls.
Here is a link to my Amazon wishlist, and as a slight aside I should really thank you for allowing me to discover that there doesn't appear to be a quantity setting on wishlists. I can ask for as many toy weasel balls as I want, so all your angry readers can participate in your call for whatever statement you felt this would have made to begin with. I figured seven hundred was a good limit. I'm not greedy, though to be fair, if any of your readers would also like to send me the batteries that would be great.
During the entire week where the people in charge of running the country we explaining that they would let the entire government collapse and spiral into financial ruin if they didn't get massive tax cuts for rich people, paid for by cutting Social Security and Medicare, everyone was on Facebook and Twitter being far more outraged that a pretty white lady surprisingly managed to not get blamed for a crime. The true moment of serendipity was of course when Mitch McConnell then said that it was proof we have to keep Gitmo prisoners in jail forever. I haven't seen such pathetic referencing since John Kerry made a Britney Spears joke during a national debate and then didn't become president.
A few of you took a break from being angry about the pretty white lady to explain that a millionaire athlete passing an arbitrary milestone of achievement in an activity of no lasting consequence to the universe in any way whatsoever was also worthy of making me hate Twitter for an entire day. Good job.