June 27, 2011
"Jason's Press Conference"
The president announced last week that he will be reducing the number of troops in Afghanistan to still more than were there than when he first took office. Now if someone, say, gained 30 pounds, and then lost 15, I would find this to be a praiseworthy thing. But as we are not talking about calories and are instead addressing 20 years olds sent off to die, it's really hard to find this inspiring.
Because analogies apply perfectly and the internet is never a home of kneejerk reactions, some of you are now able to muster the strength to force yourself to be outraged after forcing yourself to understand correctly that yes, I am most clearly suggesting that the President of the United States is a serial killer. I'm sure you are very content with your decision to think this.
Back in 2004 I was asked by my editors and bosses at the Center for American Progress to find a handful of awesome, young cartoonists for the fledgling CampusProgress.org. I was already aware of three people I immediately wanted to ask: Mikhaela Reid, Jen Sorensen and Brian McFadden. This was the first and only reasonably intelligent and professionally-advancing decision I ever made in my "career" there that shall continue to remain unspoken of in fluid detail.
Brian, who is a rather smart man, suggested that CampusProgress.org would benefit from the talents of one Matt Bors, who in 2004 was actually a fetus with mild cognitive functions, mostly developed in the areas of the brain that knew how to use Adobe Illustrator. The three of us would all later appear in a book that sold terribly. Matt single handedly created roughly 90% of all the graphic content for the site for about two years, for which we paid him, in what would be in 2004 dollars, Bed, Bath & Beyond coupons.
Matt and Jen are now featured cartoonists for the Daily Kos, Mikhaela is everything a kid could want in a mother, and in 2008 I stared drinking alcohol. So that really left Brian. I'm pleased to say our long national nightmare of Brian not being in one of the largest newspapers in the world is over.
Statistically, there is now a very good chance you'll be aware of Brian's talents, as according to math, the 1.6 million people who read the Sunday New York Times is a lot of people. And that's where you can see he work every Sunday from now on.