(Spits coffee)

Scott Armstrong alerted me to this latest treasure from the White House Press Secretary:

MR. FLEISCHER: The President welcomes his statements that Palestinian leadership may look in a different direction for how to resolve the differences between the Israelis and the Palestinians. Violence is not, and cannot, be the answer. And the President welcomes all those who hear the call for a peaceful settlement of disputes.

Uh-huh.
 

 
Oh yes

Also found out via Mikhaela: Scott Bateman has a blog. I believe the term is "r0x0rz."
 

 
Well, that sucks

Found out via Mikhaela's site that Minnesota-based political cartoonist Kirk Anderson has been canned from his local paper, which apparently placed him below private plant-watering services in the recent budget meeting.

Anderson was a really good artist and was a rare (and dying) member of a breed of local cartoonists, thus holding him to a portfolio of cartoons that weren't the same as all the others that are syndicated and usually uncreative. It's a shame, but if you read Mikhaela's post you'll get some info on how to send condolences and (if a St. Paul area resident) who to yell at about this.
 

 
Delay

The next (and final) regular strip will be delayed for about a week or two to coincide with my pre-hiatus post for my graduation. If you're an NYU student, it should be in the WSN though, so you can revel in my cheesy goodbyes a bit early.

To answer in advance: no, I'm not permanently giving up cartooning or this site, so don't worry. I'll explain in detail when I don't have arseloads of Senior projects to finish, but graduation is obviously going to change things, artistically and professionally.
 

 
Well, of course we did

A U.S. cease-fire with the Mujahedeen Khalq allows the terrorist group to keep its weapons to defend itself from attacks by Iranian-backed groups, U.S. military officials said Tuesday.

The cease-fire appears to be a way for the United States to increase pressure on Iran, which Washington has accused of meddling in Iraq after the collapse of Saddam Hussein's regime.

But the cease-fire represents a conundrum of sorts for the United States, which has classified the Mujahedeen Khalq as a terrorist organization. The United States went to war against Iraq in part to dismantle what it said were terrorist networks supported by Saddam's regime.

Yet the U.S. military negotiated a cease-fire with the group, has allowed its fighters to keep their weapons and has allowed them to use military force against what the United States says are Iranian infiltrators entering Iraq.

Full story here. For those of you calling the last thirty years of this lefty hearsay, congratulations, now it's right out in the open: the United States officially supports terrorists.  

posted by August J. Pollak at 12:09 PM

 
The more regimes change, the more it stays the same

I didn't post about this revelation when it first came out because I pretty much took it as "same old, same old." Many of you might remember that I commented about this almost exactly a year ago in regards to Afghanistan, where the government decided a week after the end of their full-scale bombing to announce that the excuse they used for said bombing was, well, crap.

So it doesn't suprise me that they've done it again, nor that they've admitted it out in the open a mere week or two after the main invasion has ended. I mean, I'm sure you're all confident that the U.S. would have given this exact same rhetoric if chemical weapons were found, or Saddam Hussein was captured?

See, that's what makes it funny to me- it's like a brand new paradigm for the Bush administration. Even their bullshit is bullshit.
 

 
Ahhhh, our work continues perfectly, o great dark lord of all that is impure!

The Supreme Court turned down the appeal on that banning of the Ten Commandments from state grounds.

With this striking blow for the black-hearted master Satan, clearly the word of God has now been destroyed forever. The lack of an obviously-essential need for Judeo-Christian imagery on government property has now been defeated, and as such the very groundwork of organized religion has been shattered, and God will die and vanish from the lips of all Americans. Finally, our victory has come upon us! For with this decision, America is religious no more!

Well look, All I had was "good," so I went for "be a sarcastic shit." Crucify me.
 

 
Subsidized Elvises and the war on Goths

From Forbes.com (that's right:)

Pork-barrel spending for fiscal 2003 reached a record $22.5 billion, according to CAGW, a 12% increase over last year. While just what counts as "pork" is of course open to debate--one man's pork being another's crucial government service--CAGW requires that pork meet at least one of seven criteria (it's not competitively awarded, not subject to congressional hearings, serves only a local or special interest, etc.). Much of the spending cited by the group is dubious indeed and takes place in the districts or states of powerful members of congressional appropriations committees. A few examples:

• $210,000 for hoop barns in Iowa


• $200,000 for the National Peanut Festival Fairgrounds in Alabama


• $250,000 for the Vermont World Trade Center


• $250,000 for the National Preschool Anger Management Project


• $500,000 for catfish health in Mississippi


• $600,000 for an oral history of the Nevada Test Site


• $1 million for the Alaska Native Justice Center

Overlapping such classic pork is the broader category of corporate welfare, which the Heritage Foundation estimates costs taxpayers more than $90 billion per year.

This is hardly just a recent problem. Consider a few examples of dubious federal spending from the fiscal year 2002 budget, as uncovered by Heritage:

• A tattoo removal program in San Luis Obispo, Calif. ($50,000)


• The Fort Union Trading Post Bike Trail in North Dakota ($500,000)


• Statue of the Roman god Vulcan in Birmingham, Ala. ($1.5 million)


• Intelligent Transportation grant for Moscow, Idaho--population 22,000 ($1 million)


• Therapeutic Horseback Riding in Apple Valley, Calif. ($150,000)


• Post-Sept. 11, 2001, airline aid to Las Vegas Helicopters, which perform airborne weddings officiated by Elvis Presley impersonators ($4,600)


• An effort to combat "goth culture" in Blue Springs, Mo. ($270,000)

"One can only begin to imagine," says Heritage, "what possessed a majority in Congress to believe that spending more than a quarter of a million taxpayer dollars to help a prosperous Kansas City suburb confront an infestation of alienated teenagers dressed in black and posing as spawns of Nosferatu is an essential responsibility of the national government."

 

 
I'll take pleasantly suprised for a hundred, Alex

Who is the champion of the independent media? What man is striking a blow against corporate monopolies?

Umm... Barry Diller, the CEO of USA, one of the largest media companies in the world.

Well. I certainly didn't see that coming.
 

 
Okay

It appears that the site is no longer in a state of utter craptitude. It's been down for the last few days, so excuse me for a bit, as my final projects are now coupled with a two or three day backlog of e-mail I've got to go through. I do it becase I love you. Especially the ones sending the photos. Except for you, Edward. You can stop sending me photos. What you're doing to that panda is just wrong.
 

 
And the horse this law was pooped out of

I am beyond happy to report that the obscene adoption regulation in Florida discussed last year has been overturned by the Florida Supreme Court, aided by the fact that state prosecutors (as if you needed more of a sign that a law was ridiculous) outright refused to defend it.
 

 
Oh just run for the damned Senate like the Green Party asked you to

The Dixie Chicks have taken a big hit lately for exercising their basic right to express themselves. To me, they're terrific American artists expressing American values by using their American right to free speech. For them to be banished wholesale from radio stations, and even entire radio networks, for speaking out is un-American.

The pressure coming from the government and big business to enforce conformity of thought concerning the war and politics goes against everything that this country is about - namely freedom. Right now, we are supposedly fighting to create freedom in Iraq, at the same time that some are trying to intimidate and punish people for using that same freedom here at home.

I don't know what happens next, but I do want to add my voice to those who think that the Dixie Chicks are getting a raw deal, and an un-American one to boot. I send them my support.

-Bruce Springsteen (God-NJ)

Update: Speak of the Dixie: Hello!
 

 
Just in case you need it written out for you

This is a pretty good assessment of the Bush administration and its war on... well... on science. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
 

 
Cartoon Network, Midnights Mon-Thurs.

I'm not a massive Anime fan, especially Anime that over-indulges on "cliche" Anime aspects (sudden manic spouts complete with widened eyes, teardrop over heads, etc.) in the midst of otherwise dramatic storyline and fantastic character concept and artwork, but I'll be god damned if Trigun isn't one of the most fantastic freaking cartoons I've ever watched in my life.
 

 
Newest comic posted - "There's no point to this strip." I need this. Really.

As far as Mssr. W. K. is concerned, my former roomate sets the tone here as to why it's just necessary to put him in your work for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Andrew W.K. is, essentially, what happens if you're a rock star who apparently takes Real Ultimate Power literally. Frankly, pointlessly referencing his ridiculous awesomeness was a requirement before I finished this strip's run, so with only a week to spare, mission accomplished.
 

 
Yes, he's an arse

So we have it for the record. Forgive me for not leaping on the whole Santorum story the day it came out, but come on, like you honestly thought Atrios wasn't going to have the goods on it. As of posting time, Atrios has just not only proven Senator Santorum to be a bigoted prick, but also a hypocritical douchebag. Trust me, those are hard to be at the same time.

The quote in question, of course, is now defended by Santorum and the Republican Party, because 1. I mean, it's not like they made fun of black people, I mean it's just gay people, for God's sakes, who gives a shit about them in November, [/sarcasm] and 2. they can get pathetic Right-Wing groups like Concerned Women for America to give a more obnoxiously smug-yet-media-savvy presence than Trent Lott got out of Confederate heritage groups.

Of course, to me, the quote is just plain ridiculous: "If the Supreme Court says that you have the right to consensual (gay) sex within your home, then you have the right to bigamy, you have the right to polygamy, you have the right to incest, you have the right to adultery ... You have the right to anything."

Well, hell. The world's going to Hades in a handcart. I mean, what if the Supreme Court said you had the right to an abortion? The next thing you know babies are gonna be sold on the open market for meat! If the Supreme Court said you have the right to vote, then you have the right to forcible takeover of the government! Is that your logic? That it's suddenly not the job of the Supreme Court to interpret the Constitution? You know, that list of rights granted to Americans?

Santorum shouldn't be removed because he's a bigot. He should be removed because he's a complete idiot with an obvious failure in understanding basic concepts of the government he's a representative of.
 

 
New toy

Courtesy of an early birthday (or possibly graduation, whatever) gift, We present your friend and narrator desperately trying to look into a mirror and a digital camera viewfinder while holding it steady and framing the shot at the same time.
 

 
Ummm....

...err... yeah. Hmmm. (via Cursor)
 

 
Pffffffffft.

Browser alignment issues recently complained about should be fixed now. Management apologizes for the site's incompatibility with browsers used by less than five people.
 

 
We need more cops- and journalists- like this

Tom Tomorrow put up an article on his blog yesterday about a California City Council that pre-emptively voted to defy the extensions of the Patriot Act. What the article he linked to doesn't mention is the overall greatness of that City Council.

This is the web site of the city of Arcata, California. Bask in it.

There's just so much to enjoy, but the pinnacle is the infamous Arcata Eye, the local paper that hosts quite possibly the most unbearably insane police log in the United States.
 

 
Scar-asshat, pt. 3

Diamond LeGrande wrote me just now to let me know about this former Congressman who was surrounded by rumors of marital infidelity and the subsequent death of one of his young female staffers. No, it's not Gary Condit, it's the asshat I've been talking about all day, who somehow never mentioned the dead staffer found in his office in his MSNBC bio. (alternate link here if the Geocities site goes down)

The difference, of course, being that Gary Condit became the media story of 2001 prior to mid-September, wheras so little was ever reported about Congressman Scarborough, and so little demands were made of him to comply with an investigation the way Condit was ordered to by the American news media that said news media knew little enough about this man's death scandal to hire him as a host of his own show.
 

 
Scar-asshat, pt. 2

Turns out Salon just published a piece this morning titled "10 great moments in jingoism," which is basically a nice journalistic way of saying the 10 greatest ways the major American news networks made complete idiots out of themselves. And look who got mentioned in not one, but two of the top 10 moments:

9. Public Enemy No. 2: The French!
"What do you think of the French in general?" Fox News anchor Neil Cavuto asked Rep. Dan Burton, R-Ind., while interviewing him about how the U.S. should now deal with nations that opposed the war. "They're not a power that I know of ... Why do we even bother with them?

Joe Scarborough, former Republican congressman and host of the nightly "MSNBC Reports" (now called "Scarborough Country"), took a similarly gratuitous swipe at our erstwhile allies who opposed our war with Iraq. Introducing a news segment about U.S. victories over Iraqi troops, Scarborough intoned, "But first, Saddam's French advisors taught him how to do one thing right: surrender."

8. Public Enemy No. 3: Entertainers!
The worst in this department was most certainly Scarborough, who devoted regular segments on his show to mocking celebrities after it became clear the war was nearly over. He showed a clip of Jessica Lange saying, "The path this administration is on is wrong, and we object. We object in our hearts, in our minds. It is an immoral war." Similarly, he showed Ed Asner saying, "I would never give this administration any sign of approval, because I think that they've ripped up this war to satisfy their own needs, not the nation's needs."

Neither of these actors, of course, predicted the U.S. would lose the war. The fact that the U.S. won doesn't make their arguments that the war was immoral or that President Bush is not to be trusted more or less arguable. But Scarborough was undeterred. "I've always found it so remarkable that these leftist stooges, for anti-American causes, are always given a free pass," he said April 10.

I think I might have mentioned once or twice that this guy is an asshat. Sorry if I hadn't made that clear yet.
 

 
Rubbing it in

Look what traitorous, horrible, anti-American country trio is still #1 after 33 weeks on the charts. And while we're at it, Michael Moore is still gracing the New York Times Bestseller list. (via Atrios)
 

 
Wow, did I speak too soon

Joe Scarborough's "clips-of-movie-stars-saying-things- proven-to-be-inaccurate- therefore-they're-obviously-completely- devoid-of-any-intelligent- worthwhile-discussion- because-I-said-so" extravaganza might have just set a record for the shortest time holding the "new low" title. Only because I just came across these ads hosted by the The Club for Growth, a Republican organization that accuses any Republican not voting for tax cuts as a treasonous Republican In Name Only. I'm not kidding. Look at the site.

But more important, take a look-see at the videos. Anyone else notice that?

Yep. That's two Republican senators. Superimposed against French flags. To emphasize their disagreement with Bush's tax plan. Braindead is not only a state, but apparently serves on the Finance Committee.

Update: Crappity! This is what happens when I only check Tom's site every hour instead of half-hour.

 

 
And we have officially reached a new low

I have no idea who this Scarborough asshat is on MSNBC; I couldn't care enough to check the spelling of his last name let alone look up the first one. But it's obvious that he's a member of MSNBC's cadre of "I-play-a-fanatic-Right-WInger-on-TV" on-air hosts desperate to cull the Fox News crowd in hope of one day bringing MSNBC's magazine-show viewership into triple digits. ("What? Hardball had 105 viewers last night? Where's the sherry?") It's a beautiful time we live in where news stations refuse to show news and music stations refuse to show music videos. I figure by the next decade the Weather Channel will just have programs about twentysmoethings and their wild hidden-camera adventures during Hurricane Timmy.

But I digress. Asshat was given an hour to bring on an apologetic Democrat and three Right-Wing "strategists," including the infamous Kellyanne Conway, who used to be the prominent Blonde media-saavy Republican on television until Ann Coulter became more convincing at pretending she wasn't over 40. Scar-whatever-the-hell was on split screen with her and the two of them had a combination of makeup and face-pulls to convincingly mimic the villains in "Star Trek: Insurrection." Basically, it was a wonderful hour of giggling at the Democrat for obviously representing the total viewpoint range of every person in America left of themselves, followed by collective verbal group masturbation about how "Bush was right" about the war.

But the issue that Republicans are touting now that makes the entire human race look embarrasing isn't the "Bush was right" logic, but the "Liberals were wrong" argument. The asshat host decided that it would be really, really humorous to cut to commercials with brief clips of interviews from eight months ago where people like Janeane Garofalo and Tim Robbins were explaining their worst-case fears about the Iraq war. Because this is both A. tasteful and B. relevant.

I would love to see mutual giggling over the videos of Bush noting the nuclear weapons in Iraq. Or the need to "prove" Saddam has them, instead of the revised "verify" we've spun it to. The idea that the Right can take moral superiority because they can claim they were "right" about their personal predictions, such as, you know, "if we invade Iraq we'll win"- (holy shit!)- in light of the countless video archives liberals could pull up is glaring. If you played a few hours of Fox News coverage from six months ago, the difference in excuses for this war are as damning to Bush's credibility as any crackpot "it was all the Jews who done it!" website online.

And I really don't need some whimpering Democratic strategist defending himelf in another assault on "liberal Hollywood" by telling me that protest "is one of the reasons Americans went to Iraq in the first place." No, it wasn't. Bush gave many excuses for invading Iraq, but I'm damn near positive "defending one's right to not suggest in any way whatsoever the negative effects of it and how they might outweigh the good in the long run" was never mentioned. Just once, once, can I get someone to just say "Oh for Christ's sakes, you has-been political bottom-feeders, hasn't the utter lack of your logic registered in your heads?"

The claims that Hollywood and liberals need to "eat crow" isn't even offensive, it's just tragically ignorant. With over a hundred allied soldiers dead, an entire culture castrated from their history and culture, thousands marching in the streets advocating the removal of American troops, sabre-rattiling at Syria, and a constant military presence remaining in Iraq and the White House now projecting an optimistic minimum of five years for "the Iraqis to have their own government," no one on the Right is in a remotely safe position to tell anyone that "we've won." To say that "it's over" isn't a sign of smugness, it's a sign of flat-out ignorance.

Oh, turns out his name's Joe and there were once enough stupid people to elect him to Congress. I never knew this country had a state called "Braindead."
 

 
Are we having bunny? That would be ironic

Going home for Easter. Things that few, if any, share with me in finding amusing to resume Sunday night/Monay morning. Have a good weekend. Now go away.

 

 
Well, I'm leaping for joy. Really.

NYU announced today that my keynote speaker at commencement next month will be New York City Mayor Mike Bloomberg. I'm sure you can all imagine the excitement flowing through the campus right now in the sheer glee over expectations of a man of such stage presence and speaking eloquence as Mike Bloomberg. Additionally, the ceremony will continue with a fifteen-minute moment of watching paint dry.
 

 
Conspiracy Three-For-Thursday

These guys claim Baghdad was set up for surrender in a secret deal. These guys think the looting of the Baghdad Museum was a professional job. And these guys think Micheal Moore didn't get as many boos as you were meant to believe. (Via Jape and Cursor)
 

 
Newest comic posted - "Let's pick on everyone!"

It's a fun-filled attack on somewhat-fake stereotypes and honest-to-god propoganda posters. I'd like to the College Republicans' site, but really, why the hell would I want to do that. Enjoy the funny. Another down, two more to go.
 

 
Free the Mouse

Today would have been the day "Steamboat Willy" became public domain were it not for the ridiculous Sonny Bono Copyright Extension Act. As such, copyrights are extended by 20 years.

It's a ridculous hypocrisy, considering how Disney is an empire created on the animation derived from works that have entered public doma-

Oh my GOD, has anyone else noticed how absolutely gorgeous it is outside?

Ummm.... goodbye.
 

 
This is just awesome.

Albiet Japan, not America, this still restores at least some of my faith in politics.
 

 
Wait, but, whoa, huh, whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?

Okay, did I miss the logic on the spin being generated by this one? Apparently the news that CNN hires armed guards and possibly exchanged silence for government access has suddenly become proof of CNN's liberal bias (enjoy the intelligence-destroying message board under the story for an example if you don't want to click to a warblog or FreeRepublic.)

So, to start with, huh? Inarguably these are allegations of questionable tact on behalf of CNN, but how is anything they may have done a sign of liberal bias? First of all, the armed guards: yes, confusing to the military, gives an image of a lack of journalistic impartiality. But unless the armed guards they hired were members of ANSWER handing out anti-government pamphlets in their off-time, explain to me how CNN biased themselves against conservatives here.

As for the "silence for access" issue, it's pop quiz time: will anyone shocked at the notion that an American news media source withheld information from the American public at the behest of the American government please take one step forward. Please, don't all get up at once. In other news: bears shit in the woods.

Finally, I can't neglect my favorite line from this article:

In Saturday's New York Post, columnist Eric Fettmann wrote: ''It's like saying that the best interests of journalism would have justified suppressing stories on the Holocaust in order to keep a U.S. news bureau in Berlin to tell Nazi Germany's side.''

For one thing, the fact that even five minutes on Google can bring up evidence of the U.S.'s knowledge and subsequent supression to the public about the Holocaust in 1941 should be enough to conclude that columnist Eric Fettmann is a worthless hack who decided a nice Nazi analogy would be a good way to make fun of a media outlet not ownd by Rupert Murdoch. But I'm far more amused that a man writing under the highly esteemed auspices of the New York Post- a 25-cent tabloid which made Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez's engagement front page news- is writing commentary about a news outlet's decisions on news of crucial American interest.
 

 
Who knows, maybe it's the lack of cheerleaders or something

I don't really watch sports that much, so I didn't really get into the whole Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon bumped off the anniversary of Bull Durham thing. My opinion of the matter come down to this: were Robbins or Sarandon going to say anything "political" at the event? Maybe. Both are vocal but as Sarandon already showed at the Oscars they can actually restrain themselves and not be the stereotype of "Hollywood Libruls" that television pundits and hack cartoonists whose money I should be getting instead of them (cough) love to cast them as.

Except not even the slightest inkling of evidence proving Robbins and Sarandon would do this came to light, and so, on his own prerogative, the guy at the Baseball Hall of Fame who just happened to be a former Reagan spokesman took it upon himself to become psychic.

So, ultimately, it's the same position about the stupidity of pre-emptive war: pre-emptive censorship is equally illogical and indefensible. As such, I'll let this editorial I found via MWO do the rest.
 

 
You're all goddamned idiots

The New York smoking ban has taken a whopping two weeks to claim its first fatality from asshole-related violence. And, of course, the blame for this is being put on, that's right.... the smoking ban.

I repeat: goddamned morons.
 

 
Gorfleblarg?

I have no idea what this is, but I'm apparently ranked #5 on it. Ummm..... yay?
 

 
Weekend mailbag

First off, the usual: thanks to all who wrote, especially those sending in the "Favorite post/comic/moment" comments, and forgive me if I couldn't make the time to repsond to you personally. Second, bear with me as I plow through this and then go back to sleep, since I had a very interesting weekend in which my friend Shiraz called from Jersey and asked if I wanted to go with him to Atlantic City in the middle of the night. So I did. And then we all went and lost shitloads of money and came back at 5:00 AM and frankly, lack of sleep and loss of money is a not-so-bright combination to your work ethic. So I'm, just going to throw out the amusing links, the quality e-mails, and then go back to bed to feel shitty some more. Oh, and Shiraz: Atlantic City. Yeah, great idea. You douche.

Loads of people wrote about the "Maintaining Support" post. Again, I really wish I could respond to everyone, but even a lot of the people I wrote back just got a "Hey, thanks." Thanks to all for the support and compliments. Despite the rapidly approaching horror that will be the end of XQUZYPHYR & Overboard's print run for the foreseeable future, the site is ironically at the height of popularity. I'm at about 80% of the minimum daily visit rate I set for myself as a requirement to start merchandising. So even if the comic goes away for a while, showing this place to more friends brings you one step closer to CafePress money-bilking mayhem. Oh joy!

Bob Rouse sent me a link to a group wanting to create a government Department of Peace. For some reason, I feel uneasy about the idea, because it sounds far too much like the Ministry of Peace and considering how the government acts with its recent new additions to government offices I don't really think the former will take place against the latter.

If you didn't read it in the news, then you can get the link here courtesy of Kim Davis: It's Saddam's Love Shack. No, really.

This is a good one, and you should act now on it since there's only two voting days left: Paul Feine sent me a link to this site called FreedomAds, which is running a contest for amateur propoganda for and against the War on Terrorism. There's an archive, and the finalists for the contest are up there for voting until April 15th. Personally, I don't think anything can beat Hercubush, but that's just me. (As of 4/11, Hercubush is down due to bandwidth limits. Sorry.)

Burt Humburg sent me a link to this article rife with more analogies you can shake a stick at, including religion, Caligula, and yes- even Star Wars.

Philip Davis gets this week's prize for keen memory, with this e-mail:

I doubt anyone will be surprised at the soon-to-be capitalization of America's "war effort" in Iraq. re: "NBC to Make TV Movie About POW Jessica Lynch," "Sony to cash in on Iraq with 'shock and awe' game," etc.
What did surprise me is this quote from Julia Day's article on the website mediaguardian.co.uk: "The phrase, coined by former US navy pilot Harlan Ullman, was adopted by Washington to describe the fierce bombardment of Baghdad on the second night of the war ..."

She apparently, along with numerous others, may have forgotten this article from four years ago...

Yes, that's Donald Rumsfeld saying it, and gosh- in an interview about how he thinks a Democratic president is screwing up a war. Who'd-a-thunk.

Okay, that's all for you, and for me. Back to bed. Or work. Or dinner. Whatever.
 

 
Tragic

It's sad that the United States has now "liberated the Iraqi people" and told them that they are free to rebuild their culture and then allowed them to destroy most of it in the course of a day.

In comparison to human life, it is nothing, I understand. But imagine your local museum. In New York City, there are many. Now imagine everything in the museum destroyed. Every artifact, every antique, every aspect of archiving the history of a region. Gone. Because, as the article noted, a tank and two soldiers couldn't be bothered.

Because of the U.S.'s negligence, the Iraqi people were allowed to destroy their own history. That includes a culture from a pre-Saddam era which could be looked upon as groundwork for a free Iraq. You'd think someone in the military might have considered that important enough to guard.

We could also, of course, address how doing this could possibly mean the United States has committed a war crime, albiet a lesser, rather unknown one. But under the The 1954 Hague Convention for the Protection of Cultural Property in the Event of Armed Conflict, it was the duty of the military to ensure the protection of cultural artifacts of serious importance unless militarily necessary to damage.

Maybe it's just the over-cultured New York liberal in me, but you think maybe the fucking museum fell under that category?
 

 
Surely this will lead to nothing bad in any way whatsoever

Via The Guardian:

---------------

Ariel Sharon has brushed aside an appeal by the White House to stop an unprecedented move by Jewish settlers into a Palestinian district of Jersualem which his critics say will further hinder a political settlement.
After more than two years of legal and political wrangling, Mr Sharon's office approved the plan last week and the first Jewish families have moved into new flats in the Ma'aleh Ha'zeitim settlement, beside the densely populated Arab district of Ras al-Amoud.

It is the first time a Jewish settlement has been built in a Palestinian area of Jerusalem since Israel seized control of the entire city in 1967.

The prime minister's critics say that Ma'aleh Ha'zeitim is a political tactic to block the possibility of dividing Jerusalem as part of a peace deal.

It also undermines plans under the Camp David accords for a corridor to give Palestinians access to Muslim sites in Jerusalem's old city without having to pass through Israeli territory.

The flats at Ma'aleh Ha'zeitim are built on land bought in the 19th century by religious groups to expand a Jewish cemetery.

The property fell into Jordanian hands after Palestine was divided in 1948.

Jewish groups argue that they are entitled to live on the land, and to remove the Palestinian "squatters", under the Jews' right of return.

The courts agree, even though no similar right is extended to Palestinians driven from their homes in West Jerusalem.

Moreover, the supreme court has ruled that Palestinians cannot buy property in the Jewish quarter of the city, even if they once lived there.

---------------

Look, my positions on the Middle East crisis are of public record, but I think even people who disagree with me about it can concede that this is utterly insane.

Bringing Israeli settlers into the heart of Palestinian Jerusalem shows that the current Israeli administration has absolutely no concern for human life. You can't even argue that Israel doesn't believe these settlements will anger terrorist groups in the West Bank and leave the settlers open to fatal and horrific danger. The fact is, there are only two reasons that Sharon could approve of something like this: either he has completely lost control of all of his mental and emotional faculties, or he deliberately desires a massive surge in terrorism in Jerusalem as justification for invading it "for security purposes." The former means Sharon should no longer be in office; the latter would mean he belongs in the Hague.

It's obvious that Arafat is basically challenging Sharon on a daily basis over who gives the least of a damn about the Palestinain refugees, but this is a situation that even a leader who knows how to lead couldn't control: with exactly what words or what security forces could Arafat use to prevent the obvious backlash in Jerusalem this news is going to bring?

Maybe it's just because I'm not connected to Israel. Perhaps if I had family in Israel that supported the military actions in the West Bank I'd be more understanding. Then again, maybe I wouldn't. But regardless, I know that if Sharon tries to take over Jerusalem with a policy of not being willing to give up any land he's taken, then he's essentially killed any hopes of peace for the next generation. And if we believe those who claim the terrorists seek the exact smae goal, then we've finally reached a moral equivalence.
 

 
Speaking of obscenity

This is an amazing article (via TBogg) about how completely and utterly ineffective our legislative process is. In the midst of an attempt to pass a bill officially making a crime out of covertly filming up women's skirts in Washington State, the bill has been battered around numerous times becuase of in-fighting, backroom dealing, and bickering over such unrelated legislation as assault convictions and tort reform.

Lawmakers in Olympia vowed to approve legislation that would withstand court scrutiny, and the House unanimously passed an up-skirt photography bill. But Senate Majority Leader Jim West, R-Spokane, has stalled the measure because its sponsor won't consider a proposal to limit medical malpractice awards.

The political maneuvering has disgusted Jolene Jang of Seattle, who testified in support of the up-skirt legislation. Jang was secretly filmed at the Bite of Seattle more than two years ago when a man lowered his camera to shoot up her dress.

"I feel completely manipulated that all my innocent efforts in benefiting society are toyed with by some political scheming," Jang said, adding she trusted the Legislature to close the loophole and feels like a victim "being pushed around on a playground by a number of faceless bullies.

"This is immature. They are not good role models. Real people are being affected here."

West said he ordered all of Lantz's bills to be held until Lantz, chairwoman of the House Judiciary Committee, heard legislation on medical malpractice reform, which Lantz has refused to do.

"I was trying to put pressure on her," he said.

Lantz said the deal was that she would rush through legislation that allows a felony murder charge to be filed against someone who commits an assault that results in death. In return, the Senate would push through her version of the up-skirt photography bill.

The felony murder bill was signed into law by the governor. But the deal broke down when the Senate wouldn't, in turn, hear Lantz' bill.

Well now, that all makes loads of sense, doesn't it? You know, when this country was founded, I'm sure that the intention of the founding fathers was to make a legislative process that revolves around who got what because of who's being how much of a cranky bitchy whiner.
 

 
Gotta catch 'em all!

I mean, really. What else does it look like?

Qusay! Sarin attack GO! Alright, so that's the most horrible thing I've ever said.
 

 
It was never about the oil

Nope. Not at all.
 

 
Shoot me. Shoot me now.

From the dateline of Operation Iraqi Freedom of Enterprise: NBC's gonna make a movie about Private Jessica Lynch. But wait, it gets better. Lynch and her family currently has no interest in selling their story to any media outlet... NBC is going to make the movie anyway.

That's right. Similar to the "unauthorized" movie about Jesse Ventura where he magically throughout history suddenly wrestled current stars from a wrestling show's parent network that financed the movie, NBC is going to use the wealth of rock-solid facts about this story without any confirmation from the subject. NBC is the parent company of MSNBC, the network devoted to expressing its utmost sensitivity and support of our soldiers. Except, of course, when there's a buck to be made.
 

 
Well, Pt. 2

Robert Strong sent me a news link in which I'm sure we're all suprised as to the whopping two weeks it took to happen. Companies have officially begun to make moves on legal ownership of the term "Shock and Awe."
 

 
Mmmmm. Exploitation.

Thousands hold rally supporting the Iraq war at Ground Zero in New York City. Because, as you all remember, Iraq blew up the World Trade Center.

Before I get the accusations of lack of sensitivity here, I want to just point out the media's own examples of being sensitive to the complexity of war: I was watching some of this on CNN before, and the reporter is interviewing a woman with a picture of her son serving in combat, saying how she's here to support her son in combat and how Sept. 11 was a sign that we need to send a message to Iraq that we won't let this happen again. The reporter made the effort to note the whole, you know, complete lack of any connection between Saddam Hussein and Al-Qaeda whatsoever, to which the woman replied, "my son before leaving told me, 'Saddam is firing at us right now the weapons he said he didn't have. If Saddam was lying now, he was lying then.'"

As Tom Tomorrow likes to say, you just can't argue with logic like that.
 

 
Well.

I'm sure not a single one of us saw this one coming.
 

 
Maintaining support

This is usually the time one makes the obligatory "well of course I support the troops and hate Saddam and am glad he is gone" disclaimer that anyone against the war has realized they have to make nearly everyday because, yes, there are literally that many people so oafishly adamant to the notion that opposition to war is retroactive support of Saddam Hussein that it's required. But I think it's relevant to make some points here, since I'm sure the likely near-end of the initial conflict is going to bring a slew of bragging proud war supporters demanding satisfaction for, honestly, doing absolutely nothing that people against the war didn't do with the exception of supporting the events that happened.

And that brings me to "supporting the troops." Jesus, what a loaded statement that is. I'm told by other liberals that they "support the troops, but not the war." Except I don't support sending the troops into Iraq. I don't support them being there. I don't support them killing people, "innocent" or not, and I certainly don't support such a high military budget that makes the existence of so many hundreds of thousands of troops exist in the first place. So what exactly then am I supporting when I'm asked if I "support the troops?" It's really the only thing left: I support troops not dying. And yet, that's exactly what I support for the people of Iraq as well in this war.

Since everyone is treating this like a game I'll make the token cheesy sports references. Asking me if I support the troops is like asking me which team I want to cheer for in the stands when I didn't even want to build the stadium in the first place because the money could have been better spent on local schools. I can't address my support of the troops because I'm being asked by the fans of the team; they've gone beyond the point I'm at and have moved to the next level. Some care about the game and focus on the team strategies and make projections on the outcome. On the extremes of both sides, we just have a lot of people who just want to argue who has better-looking cheerleaders. I'm still in the parking lot complaining that we never should have built this goddamned stadium.

What do I support for the troops? I support the troops coming home. I support a domestic policy that actually fixes this economy so the troops can have jobs and send their kids to college and raise families and not have the single instance of their lives where the government asks the entire nation to collectively support them be when they're killing people. I don't ever hear a talking head on CNN or Fox News saying how we should "support the funding increase on the Board of Education in Arkansas so high school graduates can get better jobs and not have the army as their only career option." You won't see signs on windows in three years saying "support the former soldiers' desire to send their son to Harvard." Last time I checked, the government just decided to slash veteran's benefits. To me, that feels like every sign saying "support the troops" means "support the troops, for now."

I'm sure many on the pro-war side will consider my opinions staying the way they are as some kind of humilation that "I lost," whatever the hell that means, or accuse me as I have been accused often of a blind hatred for Bush and a refusal to accept anything he does as good.

To that, I also turn to direct interpretation: so we have "won" the war. Perhaps, in the next few weeks, we will find evidence of Saddam's violations of U.N. sanctions and/or flat-out active weapons of mass destruction. Again, I sadly realize I actually have to say that uncovering this would no doubt be a good thing, but again I also ask, how does this change the past? How does this alter the illegitimacy of the invasion in the first place?

The more obnoxious of the pro-war side have attempted to gloat about the progress of the war and the fall of Baghdad, explaining that even with the cost of civilian life, it was worth it because we got rid of Hussein. Quite simply, I'm not humbled, nor do I even feel that this person is correct in their ascertainment that "they were right all along." They were wrong before, and even though they find themselves right now, it doesn't make their previous actions corrected, no matter what you say. Stop making the faulty "would you have killed Hitler" argument. We know only of the past and the present, and whatever the future holds in no way lessens the immorality of how we started this war: Instigating war with a constantly-changing rationale and a near-complete dearth of evidence. One dead civilian, let alone a thousand, will never be justified with "see, we told you so."

We could find nukes, Anthrax, a mass grave of a million skulls, Jimmy Hoffa, and proof that Saddam single-handedly created the AIDS virus. It will never alter the fact that we didn't have this before we started a war. Justification can not be declared after the fact. The ends will never justify the means because the means are, by definition, unjustifiable.

We started a war. We had no evidence. We had no moral reason. We altered both the rational and the excuse multiple times, and ultimately we killed thousands of civilians and lost hundreds of soldiers to test a theory. History will never forget that, no matter how great and how beautiful we claim we've made the world.
 

 
...Or what Harvey Kietel said in Pulp Fiction regarding premature fellatio

Tom Friedman in the New York Times titled his latest article "Hold Your Applause," which is just the same sentiment. So while we replay the video of the statue toppling in Baghdad over and over again, let's look at a few important points: Kurdish separatists are now a major issue with the government destabilized. Speaking of government, Iraqis aren't exactly sure if they have one. And for a massive victory that was the taking of the capital of Iraq, back home a few lawmakers have apparently decided this hasn't ended the war at all.

Again, though, remember: we won. Because that's all that ever matters, you know.
 

 
Newest comic posted - "Some assembly required."

Yes, I could have made a U.N. General Assembly joke, but really, you'd be too busy with your printers to find that clever. If you actually do cut this thing out, I would recommend using the large format. Actually, I would recommend not doing it at all, since my low weekend hit count indicates most of you read the strip instead of actually working at your office. Introducing scissors to the equation could lead to horrific results. As an unemployed college student, I take full initiative in telling all you lazy bastards to get off your ass and get back to work.
 

 
...And sometimes farce comes naturally

Charles Knoles sends me this Australian Broadcasting Corporation analysis of some of Fox News' groundbreaking reporting. (Enjoy the videos)
 

 
Sometimes farce is deliberate...

Chris Waldrop sends me a link to Infinite Jest's latest stab at the Iraq war, this time with some original leaflets you won't see anytime soon. Sad, since some of them seem more believable than the real ones.

 

 
"Shhh..... no talking in the library..."

Ah, yes. Four years of the best film school in the country and he's quoting The Substitute. Sorry about those thousands of dollars, Mom.

Anyhoo, as I've noted a few times before on this site, there are no Americans more greatly devoted to the First Amendment than librarians and independent booksellers, and Scott sent me an e-mail with two links proving that yet again. Similar to an earlier post I made in February about bookstores purging records to prevent the government's new powers under the Patriot Act to find out everything you've been reading, libraries are now joining in the activity. And in light of the rules of the Patriot Act forbidding libraries from telling you that the government that Really Really Cares About You is doing this, some libraries have taken note by following the rules in a completely different manner.
 

 
Feel safer yet?

The United States prison population has officially surpassed two million people. Currently one out of every 142 Americans are incarcerated.

But golly, it sure is worth it what with the complete lack of pot on the streets, right?

(link via BuzzFlash)
 

 
Don't forget, we won, remember?

Kill him, the order came back, and Ricardo Munguia, whose body was found with 20 bullet wounds last month, became the first foreign aid worker to die in Afghanistan since the Taliban's ouster from power 18 months ago.

The manner of his death suggests the Taliban is not only determined to remain a force in this country, but is reorganizing and reviving its command structure.

There is little to stop them. The soldiers and police who were supposed to be the bedrock of a stable postwar Afghanistan have gone unpaid for months and are drifting away.

At a time when the United States is promising a reconstructed democratic postwar Iraq, many Afghans are remembering hearing similar promises not long ago.

Instead, what they see is thieving warlords, murder on the roads, and a resurgence of Taliban vigilantism.

"It's like I am seeing the same movie twice and no one is trying to fix the problem," said Ahmed Wali Karzai, the brother of Afghanistan's president and his representative in southern Kandahar. "What was promised to Afghans with the collapse of the Taliban was a new life of hope and change. But what was delivered? Nothing. Everyone is back in business."

The full article here. Remind me, again, how we decided that our job was done in Afghanistan?
 

 
Mid-day delay

If I have time I'll try to post early today, but if not I'll probably be busy starting late this afternoon since I might be going to a Daily Show taping. Of course, the day I go has to be a day, in April, after I've left my winter coat home from Spring Break, that it's SNOWING. To quote the Kids in the Hall sketch, "WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS???"

Update: Plans cancelled, due to the weather. Somehow I'm not too distraught.
 

 
(Post) weekend mailbag

Just a few I took note of during the weekend reading. As always, apologies to anyone I didn't respond to. Lack of time corresponds directly with slightly less than four weeks of college left.

A theme this week can be "stuff I saw from a lot of people a while ago and ignored because I'm a slacker but now I've been sent links to them again by people so I'm grateful for the reminder." Hence, Aimee Woznick's link to a revised war terminology guide, and Scott's link to the WMD 404 error. And before you send me the e-mail about the last one: no I didn't. Look again.

In addition, Burt reminds me that people are still at it with the ready.gov stuff. I blame only myself for not cashing in on the brief (though probably illegal) bootleg T-shirt market. Damn bootleg T-shirts. If Cafepress let you make black shirts I'd have Overboard-Pirate Skulls faster than you could say "Cease and Desist from Marvel Comics."

As for my own reminders, I'm still taking public opinons about my prior "favorite things from the last year" comment.
 

 
Congratulations

...to Tom Tomorrow, who just won himself another RFK Journalism Award.
 

 
Who are you and what did you do with the crappy stories

Still reeling from the utter garbage that was its "feature" hack-job "50 Most Loathsome New Yorkers" article, the New York Press actually blew my mind by printing a readable front-page feature this week in the form of Christopher Brodeur's coverage of the USA TV movie about Rudy Giuliani. For those not aware of the history, Brodeur could very well be the official most hateful opponent of the former Mayor. As you can imagine, his opinions on the movie, which was hindered from the beginning by... well... being a friggin' USA made-for-TV movie let alone all but claiming Giuliani cured cancer, are well worth a read.
 

 
How green is this Augie

Well great, it's bad enough that her artwork has to be better than mine, it's bad enough that she had to move to New York and make my aspiring publication chances even slimmer, now Mikhaela has to go and start, you know, getting the recognition she deserves and all that.

If you never pored over her site via the link page before, give it a go one of these days. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go sulk in the corner in pathetic jealousy now.
 

 
Well, this inspires confidence

Patriot Missile accidentally shoots down U.S. F-18. This is, in fact, the second time a Patriot has accidentally shot allied aircraft, the latter incident mentioned killing two airmen. Just to remind everyone, we've been at war for only two weeks.

I am truly sorry for the familes of thse killed airmen who had to die in quite possibly the stupidest way possible in this war. Yet, it points out a historical theme. This government has a profound history of employing the military equivalent of Hubble Telescopes just to get them into the battlefield. You can imagine, of course, the confidence a missile that accidentally targets its own side projects towards Bush's desire to install anti-missile batteries around the perimeter of the United States.

But, as my previous post has already mentioned, at least there's no chemical weapons threat against the troops. But, in hindsight, I think a lot of them sort of already knew that.

Coming in 2006: SDI turret accidentally targets Providence, Rhode Island.
 

 
NEGLIGIBLE.

U.S. Military reports a chemical attack is "negligible."

And as the article mentions, the suspected reason for this is, I shit you not, that Saddam is too afraid to use them out of fear of being tried as a war criminal. What, you smell that too?
 

 
Because, you know, the vibrators weren't disturbing enough

A combination photograph shows fashionable masks worn by people in Hong Kong to protect themselves against the Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome (SARS) in this April 2, 2003 file photo. Residents of Hong Kong, always quick to spot a fashion trend, are turning to colorful surgical masks to beat the blues as a deadly virus stalks the territory. ( Reuters)

That's the photo caption, verbatim. And yes, that's Hello Kitty and Ultraman among the masks. Sanrio has now branched out to Hello Kitty brand deadly virus protection masks.
 

 
Wait a minute.

I'm more than a little confused by this one. According to this news report, the Oregon legislature- yes, that's Oregon- the same state that fielded such other shining examples of evolution in sophisticated government like proposiing that every citizen of Oregon be legally required to own a gun to "make the state too dangerous for criminals-" is pushing a bill that declares anti-war protestors as terrorists and subjects them to a risk of 25 years to life for certain actions conducted during protest:

Dubbed Senate Bill 742, it identifies a terrorist as a person who "plans or participates in an act that is intended, by at least one of its participants, to disrupt" business, transportation, schools, government, or free assembly.

Anyone catch that last one there? So, if this bill passes, then it's a crime to plan or participate in an act that disrupts free assembly... which means we can throw in jail anyone who voted for for a bill disrupting free assembly, right?
 

 
Former roomate = Awesome

Via Chris' latest post over at Do You Feel Loved:

I'll start with the ridiculously easy, ducks-in-a-barrel argument: taking on the kind of twat who rants "Remember Thom, if it wasn't for us Americans and our 'corrupt' government, you'd be speaking German right now!" Yes, "us Americans" did a really great job fighting the Nazis, didn't we, YOU DUMBFUCK? I remember single-handedly butchering an entire S.S. regiment with nothing but my bare hands and, late in the fighting, the sheet music to John Phillip Souza's "The Star-Spangled Banner." Point being, we didn't do jack fucking shit to save Britain, you asshole -- people who were alive sixty years ago did. What makes you think that you or I, just because we have a blue passport with eagles on the front, can coast on their good fucking karma for the rest of our lives?!? America -- all countries -- absolutely should not be viewed simply as the sum total of their good and bad deeds, because those were deeds committed by people who are now dead, senile, fat, out of power, etc. What matters is what we are doing RIGHT NOW, our attitudes RIGHT NOW, and those, let's be frank, are petulant, childish, and very dangerous. Of course those are shaped by the past, and of course we shouldn't ignore it, but we shouldn't expect it to give us a magical ticket that says "It's OK, do what you want, because boy howdy you sure did win that Spanish-American War over a century ago!" And can I also point out that the application of this argument to a jingoistic anti-French sentiment is also patently absurd (obviously). Every time I see someone berating the French about our assistance in World War II and how they "owe" us, I just want to scream "LAFAYETTE, LAFAYETTE, LAFAYETTE! THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA WOULD NOT EXIST WITHOUT THE FRENCH YOU BLISTERED, BLEEDING COCK!"

There's more, and it's brilliant. Absolutely fucking brilliant. Go read it and enjoy its brilliance.

Now!
 

 
Just askin'

A former oil worker who went partially blind and suffered nerve damage while being held hostage in Iraq in 1990 has received $1.75 million in damages from Iraqi funds frozen by the U.S. government.

Jack Frazier, 65, was one of 178 former hostages who successfully sued the Republic of Iraq for illegally detaining them before the 1991 Gulf War.

Frazier was working for Bechtel Corp., which was building a crude oil refinery in Iraq in August 1990, just before Iraq invaded Kuwait. He said he and co-workers were awakened on Aug. 18, 1990, and detained in the empty U.S. ambassador's home. Soldiers would not let anyone out for medicine, he said.

Because he couldn't get insulin, Frazier went blind in one eye and lost 60 pounds. His muscles and nerves began failing. He has no sensation from his knees to his toes or from his fingertips to his elbows.

Although U.S. law allowed hostages to sue foreign countries, it did not provide a mechanism for releasing frozen assets from those nations. That changed when the Terrorism Insurance Bill became law last year.

Well god, this is just unfair and offensive. Where are the brave Congressional lawmakers demanding reguation that limits this man's settlement to $250,000?
 

 
Yes, but can he dance?

Slate has compiled actual quotes from Donald Rumsfeld and framed them into poems. Enjoy.

When you're done with those, you can check out a similar job done to Bush's dialogue from a site Chris Grealy sent me.
 

 
Son of &*#%!

Okay, now that I'm done venting like a hyperactive psychopath, we're at about a 65% liklihood now that my hosting company, in light of my apocalyptic predictions about my billing problem rivaling the fictional babble of the "Left Behind" series, are going to... ummm... refund my money and fix the problem shortly.

Well then. I'm a rather large tool.
 

 
Newest comic posted - "Blow it out your..."

As one of the few members of WSN staff that doesn't need to go outside every hour for a smoke break, you can imagine how little sympathy I got on this subject. But like all the other places that have (and will) ban smoking in public, New York's going to eventually adapt. Frankly, if I hear one more person tell me how horrible the new ban is because "smoking is part of New York," I'm going to vomit. The only thing worse are the morons who claim they're not going to visit New York anymore because of the "fascist smoking ban." Seriously. If you're never going to visit the MoMA because you can't light up anymore in the bar down the street, then I really feel sorry for you.
 

 
&*#%! redux

Just an advance warning, and one I hope leads in no way to frutrition, but if by any chance this site is suddenly down, or for that matter magically changed into a porn site sometime in the next few days, it's due to a stupid hassle I'm going through with my site hosting company over a pathetic discrepancy of less than thirty bucks. Yet since I've reached the point where I called my credit card bank to have payment blocked to my hosting company, god knows what they'll do in response.

You know, I'm really pissed about it because up until now they were great people who never caused a single mistake with my service. But when they decide to charge me for something I never asked for, then refuse to have ANY form of live support to handle a billing adjustment and instead just go with it and e-mail me telling to send them my bill in six weeks when I get it in the mail because, you know, that's fucking easier or something, I decide that a credit card company with 24-hour service that can, in five minutes, block payments to people, is much easier to work with.

Hopefully, the hosting people will get the notice on non-payment at the same time they get the e-mail emphasizing my desire to never have been given the "service upgrade" they charged me for never ordering in the first place and everything will work out within 24 hours. Or, they could just suspend my account for not paying them for something I never ordered, and everything can go to shit over thirty bucks, because hey, that's how advanced technology works.
 

 
And the readers celebrate the day as well

Thanks to various readers, we're all reminded of this special day. The United States is doing incredibly stupid things that's pissing off our fragile coalition, support for the president in a time of war isn't exactly at the highest levels Bush would want it to be, and the disheartening statistics are just piling up.

Simple war lasting a few weeks? April Fool's!
 

 
&*#%!

The site's on-off screwed up again, damned if I know why. Sorry for any inconvenience.
 

 
Every day should be a day like today!

According to Neal Pollack (no, he's not, it's even spelled a different way) it's Make Fun of Dick and Lynne Cheney Day. So, consider my hatred for them multiplied for the next 24 hours.

Not really sure how much anti-Cheney content to provide, save a necessary link to Mark Morford of the San Francisco Gate, whose routine lambasting of Lynne Cheney is now famous across the Western American seaboard. Enjoy.